I just forced Jack to give me a bunch of kisses and list all the things he likes about me in exchange for a Google+ invite. His list:
- “Your face”
- “I like how you’re at the forefront of technology.”
- “Your pants”
- “Your youthful skin”
- “I like your eyes. They’re brown like… bacon”
quiz and/or exam every week for the next 5 weeks AYIYIYIYI
then it’s smooth sailing
for a month
with no money
k cool update bye
this is also my life, like exactly starting today
brother: Fah-sfuh. FAH-fsuh?
me: what are you doing?
brother: look, google has this new voice microphone search thing. i’m trying to look up the FAFSA website. FAF-SUHH.
me: so you’re doing that instead of just typing five letters?
brother: ugh it works on other stuff, i guess acronyms are harder for it. this is the future.
me: lemme try, SAND-WICH BAAGS. ..hey look, it worked, sandwich bags came up! i guess the key is to talk down to it like it’s stupid.
the other night, ian and i were in bed watching sleepless in seattle and i kept turning my head to say something to him but every time i looked i was kind of taken aback at how hot he is. like one time, i actually forgot what i was going to say. another time, i got really embarrassed that someone so attractive likes me, so i pulled my shirt over my face and apologized for being such a freak.
it must have been some really good lighting that night or i am blind to his handsomeness most of the time.
- Homeboy: Aye Lauren, you up in Richmond and you didn't come over? I'm mad you don't hit me up tonight. Never answerin my texts after midnight..
- Me: Ha, you're so right, but I have my reasons, but I'm coming in a few. Give me a few minutes to change.
- Homeboy: SWAAAAG...ayeee.. so official. ;)
- Me: Ew, Nevermind..
- Homeboy: What?
- Me: Say what you just texted me out loud & then wink. That's what..
- hahahaha. I just died. What is up with people & "SWAG". If you have to repeatedly say you HAVE something, you don't. It should show. Shutup with your "swag" remarks. No one cares, & if they do... they're most likely a lame as well.
Smh/props: older ladies who ride the bus but are listening to an iPod while checking their iPhone and reading their Kindle. You have so much money; I would like to be you.
Unless she is a burglar! Who has that many toys but rides the bus? Ugh, I bet she wants to “be green”. I hate when people give me reasons to like them. It’s so frustrating.